THINGS I HEAR AS A BOY BOM
As a proud boy mom, I often encounter well-meaning individuals who, upon learning I have sons, offer sympathetic nods and comments like, ‘wow! Raising one boy is hard, you have two!’ or ‘oh god! Life must be manic’ or ‘ Will you try for a girl?’ or when they take the patriarchal and even more annoying route of, ‘Good! someone to join the family business’
Thank you but, no thank you, I don’t remember asking for opinions.
I am not the kind of person who always sees the need to address such frivolous statements, but I’ve decided I cannot be the MOM who doesn’t address these very unnecessary comments people feel the need to pass.
It’s time to change the narrative and more importantly debunk the myth that raising boys is inherently more challenging than raising girls. There are so many more important factors that differentiate them and each child and mother face their own set of unique challenges irrespective of gender.
Join me as I explore the misconceptions surrounding boyhood and celebrate the joys of being a boy mom.
The assumption of difficulty:
One of the most prevalent stereotypes about boy moms is the assumption that we must be constantly grappling with chaos and mayhem. From visions of muddy footprints to broken toys to the idea that boys are just wild and uncontrollable, society often paints a picture of boyhood that is rife with challenges. However, the reality is far more nuanced. And being a Millennial Mom, that is constantly fighting stereotypes to carve way for a more equal modern parenting approach and raising men of tomorrow, my husband and I are very sure of exactly what kind of men we don’t want to raise.
Boys are just kids:
At the heart of it, boys are children first and foremost. Like all children, they require love, guidance and boundaries. While boys are biologically built differently and may express themselves differently than girls and have their own unique interests and challenges, parenting is ultimately about fostering a nurturing and supportive environment, regardless of gender.
Stereotypes limit boys and parents:
The belief that raising boys is inherently difficult not only perpetuates harmful stereotypes but also places unnecessary pressure on parents to do and be a certain way. When we approach parenting with preconceived notions about gender, we risk limiting our sons’ potential and overlook the individuality of that child.
Challenging gender norms:
As boy moms, we have the opportunity to challenge the traditional gender norms and empower our sons to embrace their authentic selves and breakdown this wall created by society and gender roles. Whether they love sports, art, science or storytelling our role is to support their passions and encourage them to explore the world with open minds and hearts.
Whether you’re raising a girl or a boy, I think being a mom to your child is simply a source of joy. I love the adventures I have with my boys and the adrenaline induced activities they enjoy, just as much as I love our heartfelt conversations about their little big dreams. Their boundless energy and curiosity is something I will always strive to protect.
So again, whether you’re a girl mom, a boy mom or somewhere in between, know that each one of us has our own triumphs and challenges on this journey, and it is that much more important to focus on raising happy, healthy and compassionate individuals, because God knows that’s what this world needs.
Parenting is about embracing the beauty and complexity of raising children in all their wonderful diversity. So, let’s challenge the stereotypes and celebrate childhood and create a world where each child grows up feeling valued, cherished and free to be their most authentic selves.
From a mom to a mom.
- Veronna D
Also these are my own thoughts based on my personal experiences and by no means aim at hurting anyone.